"How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these." - George Washington Carver.

As I promised you after we talked this evening with your wife, the three of us, I will draft this blog and publish it on FRIDAY. It's the Friday TALKS.

Thanks for the company this evening, your wife is always a calm and nice lady to be in her company, and I'm glad we all listen to each other, thanks for reading my post over and over again, I mean the both of you. I am not a marriage adviser, I am not a teacher, I am not someone who knows it all. I am human like you both, we're not perfect and we'll never be. Many people have sent me e-mails about the post, I felt fine and think I am making a huge differences, despite I don't know what kind..

I'm glad you listen and listen deep and give your whole being into this progress to make your marriage works. Listen is a big thing for me, I likes to listen and I likes to follow up and ask if I'm in doubt, I learn and we both learn from each other when we do listen. Even wild animals in the jungle do listen to each other and to there predators too.

Brother, your wife loves you and she's sincere with you the same way you too loves, cares and sincere to her. It's a blessings and please don't forget to counts on those blessings always. See, I am an emotional man and looking into her eyes as she talks to us both, do you listen when she says: Brother Sayed, I wants to call you and talks to you about our marriage bumps, but I loves my husband and respect him so much, I don't want to calls outsiders to complain or show them messages of our problems. Hey Bro, that's the point here, let me tell you something: I know many people who will forward text messages or makes complains to outsiders or complete strangers about anything in between there partners, I know so and I've seen it many times and it's will always happens. Is that true love? I don't thinks so Sir. If there's true love, you two can always talks about things, in bed, in the car, in the movie room, anywhere, everywhere. If you two can't communicates well, who else will? Your pillow can be the only wittiness between you two. Many people will asked there friends, family's or anyone how to solves there problems, some will make up stories that don't even exist. But let's lean to forgives too, always.

My daughter is always a good example: Her Mom thinks my little girl likes me  than her, I always tells her that's not true, but you know what? I listen to my little girl talks, I makes sure no one else matters when she wants to talks, I don't answer phone calls sometimes, just for her to get all my attentions, and guess what? It always works, she will tell me lot and I ask questions and sometimes try to makes jokes just to lighten her up. I've to do it for her, or else she will look out there for someone who will give her ears, fatherly figure and that will be disaster and deadly.

Brother, marriage is not easy and nothing in life is easy, and no matter how good you thinks you might be, there are others out there who thinks you worth nothing, nothing at all. So don't think otherwise, just be strong and devout all your might to GOD and your family's and love one's. True love to the bone is not easy, you might hurts others, not that you mean to hurts anyone, but it will always happened and you have to watch for signs of misunderstandings, we all mis-reads each other and we all pretends we know what otherwise fells and we tends to correct others than we corrects ourselves.  We tends to looks at other as problems and makes others look bad. It's human nature right? But why can't we uplift others with the little gifts we all have in us? Yes, we can make changes in others life by starting with us first.

Brother, God is good, no matter how things goes south, we must always keep our FAITH and stay away from negatives intends. The World is full of wonders and there's always a catch and we're living in limbos sometimes. I've learn never to be afraid of the unknown, I mean all of the unknown, and there's lot of it. Accept others always for who they're, we all can't be the same always, even our kids are not always like us,  We have to stand up when we fall, cause we will always falls, but we just have to pick up ourselves and brush off the dust and look up for morrow. All our little actions counts daily. Be strong.

Love is a gift from God, yes I mean it. True love is real, it all depends how much we puts into it. Listen to your hearts and sometimes just don't do things because it's the only way out, think again and ask questions. We're in our 40's now, we're no kids anymore, we don't have to acts like one, despite we feels like one sometimes, I do always, but I shakes it off. Be calm. I won't ask you to put your foot in someone else shoes,  some shoes are too big or small for us, but think about what others are going through sometimes and imagine you in it.

If a woman loves you for who you're and what you're not, don't hurts her, as long as she won't hurts you. We all falls short always, but accepts your mistakes, don't make up stories, say the truth always. Talks more to your love one, play more with your loves one. Ask more from your loves one, support each other. Every one falls in LOVES sometimes, I don't who will resists it when it's real love.

I respect your wife in so many ways Brother, God bless your UNION. What a woman? She don't call the outside into your marriage like so many others will do in a heart beats? Let's keep this chat going and I'll have another post sometimes soon, but I've to address this slaughter of innocent people in Syria, as a blogger, I enjoys my right to run my mouth on anything. Is that for real?

The Friday Talk I promised.

"I always felt that the great high privilege, relief and comfort of friendship was that one had to explain nothing." - Katherine Mansfield

It's the Friday ritual, as a Muslim, I tried my best to observes my Friday's as the Jews or Christians will do there's on Saturday or Sunday. I always looks forward to it like  little babies wait for there parents or love one to come home from wherever.

This Friday, was just like every other one, except when one of my friends, who we sometimes hangs out after prayers for few minutes of chats and check on how each other doing and family's well being. My friend is married and I always say to him: You're a good man, I've to seeks some knowledge from you and your wife, I admires at you and the way you devout to your Faith and family's and friends. Sometimes he will say to me, no, I admire at you Brother Sayed, you're my hero. Your HERO? I will asked with my little eyes wide open. I know I am not a hero, I thinks I am just a regular guy who's not perfect but try to do the best one can. Been perfect is a whole different stories. Like another friend of mine will say's: "Show me a PERFECT person, I'll show you the worst and hypocritical person in this World". I thinks I've to go with his idea some how.

My friend wants to talk to me about something, as I can see in his face, something is troubling him, he sometimes says to me, why do you always looks people directly in there eyes as if you can see there SOUL? Wow, I'll say, there SOUL? He will say's yes, you don't takes your eyes off anyone you're talking to. You don't blinks, I'll smile and say's, if I blinks, I'll missed out, We'll laugh and just be men, since we're no more boys, we're old folks now, as my daughter will tells me.

O Kay, enough of blah blah now, let's get to the chase. My friend wants to talks to me about his "House Hold", I mean marriage problems, in my case, I don't thinks it's a problem, but yet it can be. It all depends. I said to him " Brother, come on, there's nothing in your house hold you can't handle, you're the best guy I've seen out here, you're the man, the real deal. O kay brother Sayed, just listen to me now. Sayed is the name my beloved Grand mother gave me and it's special to me always and many friends calls me by that name. It makes me calm down some how, (I just want you to laugh). My friend is a good man, full of kindness and gentle, he talks less and always ask questions in order for him to learn and understand, that's the way I try to be sometimes.

My friend loves his family's and everyone around him and his family's. But sometimes life gives us "Curve Ball", we might not picture it right, but we've to accepts somethings and try to change some other things that we can. Love is love, despite love can be hurtful sometimes and mimic us or drag us to our feet and makes one surrender his whole being for the pursuit of it. I know I've said lot in just this one sentence. To cut to this chase, my friend is seeking my advice's or just looking for someone to listen to him while he vents or express his pains. So I calm myself down and let him talks, he talks for 30 minutes or more, during this period, I says nothing, but listen and give him all my attentions. It's feels good. By the time he finished, tears in his eyes, but not crying, as the saying goes" Big boys don't cries". Now in this blog, I will not mention what my friend told me, but I promised him that I'll blog about it and let him ask his wife to read this particular blog and I am dedicating it to them: So, take this: What can I call those words below?

My advice: Oh hell no, it's not advice's, by the way, who is me to advice any one? But let me start by saying this:
 *Try to understand how other people feel through emphatic listening, and observing.


*Be open and sincere with everyone in your life. Don't hide things in your life from love one's.


*Don't take yourself too seriously, No one else does. Be calm, smile, play more and devout.


*Be content with where you are, who you are, and what you have always.


*Do the right thing, always, it doesn't matter how small that is. Try to learn from our daily mistakes.


*Find ways to release your stress often. Exercises, May be that's why I've crush on workouts.


*Do more of the things that gives you pleasure, I've few that real gives me lot of pleasure, can I say them?


*Find your passion, and create your life based on this passions.


*You don't have to win every arguments, But be able to agree to disagree. Let others wins sometimes.


*Don't always look out for fights, or be-little your mates, or talks down on anyone, but uplift others.


*Stop the drama, it breaks up happy home. Be real with love one. Talks and talks to understand.


*Don't blame others, accept mistakes, say I'm sorry and be sincere about it.


*Look your love in the eyes always, anyone who can't do that, they're not real.


*Call your love one by there names always, it's a big crush on both side. I loves my name, I really loves my name and it makes me attach to anyone faster and makes me know if that person is real or just breeze.


*Put your partner first always, show your partner that they do matter, no matter what. Smile more to each other and don't go to bed unhappy while you can seat and talks. Hold hands and talks more. Feel each other heart beats, and talks more, if nothing to talks, just hold hands and looks each other in the eyes, don't blinks. (lol) You've to blinks.


*If the house is quite, just the two of you: Pls. pop in a CD and dance slowly, I mean closer and just dance, you might not know how to dance, but try and hold each other closer and closer. Oh yeah, I mean closer.


*Remember this: Life have no promise for morrow, today is our's and morrow is in the future, who knows what will happened? Only GOD knows.

Hey brother, I do have more to say, but this is part one to my promise to you and your lovely wife, tell me what happens and I'll post part two, It's lot to say.

Love don't have to be pain or sad or expensive, love is to the bone when both sides can put the odd or bad things aside and look at the good of life and love it self. Please don't try to be perfect or pretends, just be you and be respectful. No needs for story telling or jumping the high ropes, you're bless to be here and to be born. So let makes sure we make the good of ourselves always

Some people will be confused and they'll try to get you confused and make stories against you that you don't even aware of. Don't hate them, but accept them and let them be. In many cases, they might change for the better if they truly loves you. I am a big believer in that, people will change for the better if you gives them the opportunity to. So don't close your doors. Open up and lighting you. As Louis Armstrong sangs: "What a wonderful World". And yes, I thinks so too. Don't you?

I'll see you on Friday, GOD willing.

For Love

“I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.”

As I seats here looking at so many beautiful posting on Facebook and twitter about Valentine's day, I decided to just jot some few taught or let me say things that I feels like sharing or grabbing from others, you know what I mean....

Love, laughter, joy, fun, passion and all the good things we long for or share are GOD blessings to us and we've to always make use of them. For many of us who have loved and been loved or been hurts or kicked around like football, we just know that tomorrow might be better than today or worst, it all depends how we takes it or wants to look at things. But I always prefers to look at all as blessings and it will get better.

I know sometimes we all wants to ask why loves hurts or misunderstood. I thinks sometimes we assumed that our mates have to know us all in details and we're so perfect and we're like book, well printed and neatly puts. But that's not how life itself is. No one is perfect and we'll never be, so don't even try to, if you do, you might be a fool to thinks so. So wake up and be real about it in the first place. O Kay, let's move on.

I've learnt to compromised and not to blames others for anything that happened in our life,  I thinks if you or someone loves you, there have to be good communications, compromises, respect and nothing to fear or hides. When those above things are missing, that's not a relationship but drama. There's nothing sweet or good like talking to your love one and looking at each other in the eyes and giving your heart out, asking questions to make sure each one understand one and other is a most, but don't prejudge or talking down on your partner, is not right, we don't have to always wins or pick a fights, but asking simple questions will yield lot of good fruits.

As I listen to others talks about daily life and struggles and some fun, I always comes to realised we're all one, we might looks and talks different, but we're one in sight of GOD always. And our struggles continues, but we can do something about our daily life's and how we treats others in our life.

Like a friend asked me sometimes ago, why do love ones always fights or talks bad to each other? Instead of caring and support one and other? Oh well, I says, it's just part of life, he says: Part of Life? Yes it is. But in  few seconds, I said to myself, no, it's not part of life. We've to do better and supports each other and go the extra miles for each other and stand up right for each other and loves each other more and make each and everyday the best not the worst.

I sometimes imagine or let me say dreams to be in this place where we can: Talks, Hold hands, smiles, listen to each other heart beats, cries together, share good or bad news together, wear same T-shirts, cooks together, lay calm and give all our best to the one we loves and don't thinks about any negatives or wrongs about our love ones. We always have to pay attentions to one another and makes sure we're on the same page sometimes. 

Is not good when a love one is crying his or her hearts out to you and you're fighting them or assuming otherwise. I've learn to listen more and always give 100% attentions to love ones, it pays back millions. Despite we might always be  corrects, but let's learn to cares deeply for each other. Life have no promise for morrow, so why hurts others or fights others or put down others? No, we can do better, Oh yes we can. 

It's Valentine's Day...